Something has been bothering me greatly for several weeks but I’ve been hesitant to write about it. After reading comments from so many hurting moms, I think now is this time. I realize that what I have to say may sound harsh but I think I can handle the backlash. As with everything I write, I write this with a loving heart. I hope you will read to the end, even if it makes you uncomfortable.
If you were to read all of the comments and all of the messages that I have received (at this point they are in the tens of thousands, and I have tried my best to read them all) you would be heartbroken. Messages from moms that have lost their only child, those that have buried multiple children and ones that are waiting for “the call”. The ones that hurt me the most are the ones that are suffering in silence whether their child is in active addiction or dead. They suffer in silence because they are ashamed and feel judged. There are parents lying about the cause of their child’s death because of the stigmas attached to mental illness and drug addiction! It isn’t just the world that causes them to feel ashamed. Religious people have their hand in that too.
I have trouble wrapping my head around the many words of encouragement and love and prayers said on my behalf. I love reading the comments, especially if I’m down. God uses each one of them to show me his love and support. That being said, there have also been some seriously nasty comments to my original post calling my son a dumpster diving junky, saying he should have just said “no”, calling his death natural selection at its finest, and mocking my faith. I’ve left those in the comment section, only deleting the ones with profanity. I went to the page of each person that posted something of that nature to see what their life looked like. Most, but not all, that chose to respond so negatively had scripture on their pages....pictures of crosses and Jesus. In other words, they are religious. Let that sink in for a minute..... If that is the attitude they have on something posted by a mother whose son died from an accidental drug overdose (on which they are not required to comment) that is their opinion overall.
This dumpster diving junkie’s mom is a CHRISTIAN and I can tell you this, Jesus is not standing behind the hate that you spew. That ain’t Jesus. These moms that are hurting and suffering in silence aren’t just afraid of the world’s judgment. They are afraid of the judgment casted by THE RELIGIOUS. To take it a step further, SO ARE THE ADDICTS! Instead of standing with arms wide open as the disciples of Christ, people that claim to be religious are neglecting those that need His love the most. There are many, many phenomenal churches out there that are fighting this battle with us, and there is victory for thousands, but the sad fact is, the majority of religious people are not. People are hurting. People are suffering. People are dying. When you refer to someone with such a derogatory and callous term, are you forgetting that they are a human being that Jesus died to save? Do you wonder if there soul is saved? Do you have compassion for your neighbor? Or do you just judge?
We live in an apathetic world, of that there is no doubt. The church is called to be set apart, to be a light, to be a beacon of hope to the lost and hurting - not to share the apathy and stand in judgment.
That. Is. Not. Christ. That is RELIGION.
To the churches that work tirelessly to minister to the ones trapped in addiction, I pray the Lord blesses your ministries abundantly and that your harvest is plentiful. To those that are standing in judgment and pointing a finger, I implore you to get into the Word. Get to know your Savior. He would not and does not approve of how you are treating those that need Him the most. He left the 99 for the 1, and so should we. If you know Him, YOU were once "the one". After you thank Him for pursuing you, ask Him to give you the heart to love those that you would label "dumpster diving junkie". If you look hard enough, you will see a reflection of yourself. The Pharisee (religious man) that prayed “thank God I’m not like the tax collector (sinner)” soon found out that it was the tax collector that knew he was a sinner that God blessed.
Mommas - If you hear it from no one but me, know this, Jesus sees you. Jesus sees your babies. His love and compassion for you and them knows now boundaries. He feels your pain, He hears your prayers, He collects your tears and He hasn’t given up on you or them.